What About Your Friends?

FRIENDS

In the year 1992 TLC came out with a song entitled: “What About Your Friends”. Little did I know in that same year I’d meet my very best friend in room 219 on the 2^nd floor of Pierson Elementary School. Then a few years later, I'd meet my other best friend at the House of Prayer Missionary Baptist Church. I am grateful for my best friends and my good friends. When this song came out, it was so catchy and fun. I would sing along to it on the radio and watch the video on Video Soul. I liked this song so much my cousin Shonda videotaped it for me on VHS, so that I could watch it as much as my heart desired. (Shout to you Shonda, you da real MVP) The meaning of this song when I was seven years old didn’t carry much weight, but as time has gone on, I’ve come to realize the importance of friendship. I have discovered what being a friend is and what to actually look for in a quality friend. So, if you’re ever wondering who your real friends are, how to spot a friend, or how to be a friend, take this simple questionnaire given by T-Boz, Left Eye and Chili.

1
    What about your friends?

Like for real, what about them? Are they kind? Are they loving? Are they supportive? Are they honest? Your friends are a reflection of you. Do they share your same values? Are they trying to rob the store or are they trying to start a business? What type of energy are your friends bringing to your space? Are they lifting you up like Rafiki did Simba or are they tearing you down like Scar did Mufasa? 

Do they have your back? Like literally have your back? Like that time I was at a comedy show, decided to get up in the middle of the comic’s routine, bent over cause I dropped something, showed my butt crack, and my best friend went out of her way to cover up my big ole booty before the comedian could have a roasting session. That’s what I mean by having your back. Somebody willing to help you, so you are not looking bad out here in these streets. Please note that the comedian still had a field day with my behind, but instead of just roasting me, he roasted her too and we laughed like two cackling hens!  

Me, my best fran, and Comedian Donnell Rawlings

Will they stand their ground?

     This one is simple. Will your friends stand up for you when you’re not around? When others are having a READ session and you’re the topic of choice, will your friends stand up for you, or will they read you for filth with the crowd? When others turn their backs on you, or when you’re not extra poppin’ anymore will they still stand for you like the Beyhive does for Beyonce’? Will your friends stand for you, good, bad or indifferent?

Will they let you down?

Sometimes it’s inevitable to not let someone down. I totally get that. Maybe you’re unable to make it to an event or you forgot to call back or text when you said you would. But don’t let your friends down when they truly need you. If your friends make it their business to constantly let you down, then maybe it’s time to let homeboy or homegirl go. Deuces!

.       Are they gonna be low down?

This is when it gets real. Are they gonna date your ex-boyfriend that you ugly cried about? Are they going to make up rumors about you? Are they going to lie on you or to you? Are they going to reveal that secret that you confided in them about? Are they secretly jealous of you? Are they wishing your blessings to come to an end?  Are they going to be all on the record and dancing in the music video of your demise?

.      Will they be around, or will they turn their backs on you?

Will they be around? When my mother died, I felt like I was dying too and my friends came to my aid like America does for foreign countries. Quick, fast, and in a hurry! I mean they came to my aid so quick, it was astonishing! They came complete with hugs, love, prayer, food and encouraging words. When my heart got broken into tiny little pieces by the men I loved, they talked me out of committing felonies and reminded me of how fabulous I am. They emphasized that those creepazoids just didn’t deserve me. When I was with child, my friends let me crash their parties with my big self, cry on their shoulders, rubbed my belly and made me laugh. Whenever I went on one of my acting adventures they were there. When I didn’t have the best jobs they were there. When I didn’t look and feel my best they were there. When I was broke.com, we found alternatives to have fun that didn’t require money.  True friends won’t turn their backs on you no matter the circumstance!

What about your friends?